QUOTE: Taisha Abelar (Toltec nagual)

Intent is really a line, a force that connects one directly with the energy out there at large. And, because it has intelligence, is a guiding order of sorts. They call it the Spirit, the Eagle. But when man links his personal energy to the energy out there through impeccable acts, then the Spirit itself moves the assemblage point for him, because in a sense he has relinquished control.
He has relinquished himself, his ego. He has let go, and is allowing the guiding force of intent to move him.’ 

Imagine that you never truly get to breathe the fresh air of freedom and inpowerment, with clarity and knowing?

Now – enjoy the whining and cringing, groaning and moaning and get on with it! This is boot camp and each and every one of you is clearing, transforming and taking leaps into a future that would not have been possible if you were not on this journey. Each week that goes by, you are opening up to new possibilities and potentials and closing down the ones that no longer serve you.

In honesty – there is ONLY one part of us that can cringe, moan, groan and wail . . . our mal-aligned ego who is ever eager to be righteous, indignant, belligerent, rebellious, obstinate and sorry for itself.

Never forget that a Nagual (Teacher – Jacqui Indian word) has two faces: the friend and the nagual and sometimes the nagual within will say something that the friend never would say. They are distinctly different. So, as much as some of the Quests seem tough and confronting, spirit seems to feel that you can all do this and emerge triumphant! Behind the scene, we are still the down to earth and loving people we have always been . . . even when you dislike us immensely.

THE OBJECTOR-PROTECTOR

By now, you have discovered, to varying degrees, the components of your Dark Tree and more is unfolding and bubbling up. It is important that you take note of your resistances and how hard a particular component within YOU is pushing back – fighting to stay in place. It may feel like you are fighting an internal Goliath and you are sometimes losing the battle. There is ample reason for this!

Within each of you is a personage which is metaphysically and hypnotically termed the Objector/Protector. In its negative state, it is in full Objector mode and in its positive mode, it is a true Protector – a counterpart on the light side who is a very glorious and wondrous part of you. (to be addressed at a later stage).

The negative Objector, is the “you” who continually repairs the Dark Tree. Every time you break down shame, it comes along and repairs it. It keeps repairing the Dark Tree and all its components to maintain continuity. It keeps saying ‘whatever you do – don’t receive!’

It keeps reminding you of the wounds of the past, the need to control, the fear of loneliness, the refusal to be intimate, and the narcissism. This Objector is the one who reminds you of what you can’t have. You can’t have love, happiness, vision or magical success. Or if you get it, it will tell you that you can’t keep it. It will prompt you to go out and sabotage yourself.

The Objector is the one who tells you what you can’t have, what you can’t hold, what you will lose and what you can’t live up to. It is the Objector who objects to anything that might be different to what already is. It is the Objector who has the reasons of why not and the “yes, but’s”. You need to be aware of what your Objector says along the way through your Dark Tree journey.

Now let us begin on a journey into a civilisation that began as a paradise and ended up as a dictatorship . . .

EXCERPT FROM THE BHAGAVAD GITA . . . (with commentary from Swami Mukundananda)

“Under the sway of the ego, people identify with their mind and become confined by its dysfunctional and repetitive thought patterns. They become practically possessed by their own mind, which goes on and on like a broken record, and they live in the reality their thought system creates for them. One such thought system of the impure mind is complaining. It loves to whine and feel resentful not only about people but also about situations. The implication is, ‘this should not be happening,’ ‘I do not want to be here,’ ‘I am being treated unfairly,’ etc. Every complaint is a little story that the mind makes up and the individual completely believes in it. The voice in the head tells sad, anxious or angry stories about one’s life. And the poor individual, under the sway of the ego, accepts what the voice says. When complaining aggravates, it turns into resentment. Resentment means feeling bitter, indignant, aggrieved or offended. When the resentment becomes long standing, it is called grievance. A grievance is a strong negative emotion connected to an event in the past that is being kept alive by compulsive thinking, by the re-telling of the story in the head of ‘what someone did to me.’ Krishna says that the demoniac who chooses to live in the mesh of delusion created by the ego, become bewildered by numerous thoughts of the poorest quality. Consequently, they obscure their own destiny.” 

Each person contains an inner civilisation of the combined identities of the self, which they learn to govern with psychic politics and this becomes the framework for the government of the outer reality and outer government of the times. The Ego/Objector arises from the civilisation of the inner psyche, just as a dictator, president, prime minister or king arises from the masses of the people in a country. They are appointed, chosen or take control according to the inner politics first.

QUOTE: J Balch

‘I knew I still clung to the symptoms

because they still served a purpose . . .’

THE ANATOMY OF DOUBT

Never doubt, doubt is the destructive sword of the self image, it is a destructive force associated with humanity, it is your jailer or the doom of hell fire. This entire civilisation is cultivated in the misery of doubt and suspicion and you are always on the offensive. Genetically, the human being doubts and doubt is like the offensive attitude of the self image or that real monster that you all have within you!

A real monster or attitude or persona – that is a declaration of expression that is offensive to everything . . . it is suspicious about everything and if you endeavour to point that out, it is suspicious about the reasons why you are pointing it out. Imagine that the monster or the image, is in part, there because your brain was affected genetically 500,000 years ago, from the enormous exposure to radiation that created a mutant being that was less than a God? That unfortunate creation genetically affected the brain so that the neurons of the brain do not fire properly in the cerebral cortex and that the brain produces acidities – more acidities and less proteins, that create a feeling of anxiousness, stress and those in turn go hand in hand with the persona of being on the offensive – the doubting monster!

The spirit has the ability to change the physical body, attitude and can heal overnight. Attitude and willpower can bring transformation but if the ruler in the inner civilisation is the tyrannical self image, change will not happen. When Christ said, ‘get behind me satan!’ –  he wasn’t talking to a being that was a devil . . . but his own monster doubt! To get beyond doubt you have to speak a lot of words, you have to do a lot of things, no matter how many things you do and how many miracles you see, you end up doubting them. That is the MONSTER, if your attitude has been in this offensive image you have become the slave of a great inner tyrant that knows how to use that offensive attitude. This monster can motivate you into such a fury, you will march against innocent people and destroy them, you have done it before! All you have to do, is to become suspicious about your neighbour, friend, teacher etc and you will hate them without them doing anything to you.

Imagine Doubter, that you meet a Magician who is doing wondrous things in the unknown, unphysical, unseen but you cannot see it here with your brain – is it real, is it happening? The doubter says – you didn’t do anything, ‘cause where is it? Show it to me, that is where you should slap yourself in the face and tell yourself to wake up (direct from the Lama).

The Doubter sees the little they can here in physical reality but cannot see the kingdoms and the lands you have access to, to wisdom and masters that is a very real part of your world. They think that it is not real and quietly where no one can see, the Master brings in certain elements of the unseen and allow them to be physical. Why do true magicians never reveal their abilities and gifts, talents and powers – because they will not be placed on trial by Doubters, who no matter how many times they are shown, will always revert to Doubt.

You take the sword of doubt and hack to pieces every beautiful thing you did in the unseen place of your being, just because you don’t see it there. It was the Doubters who crucified Christ as they could not see what was happening in the non-physical and were only convinced by their physical senses and righteousness. You have to look at how small you really are, how tiny you really think, your world in mass is so fixed you can’t change it, you can blow it up, disease it, eat it just like you are doing with your bodies, but you can’t make it greater because the mind that made it great, is a place that only greatness can enter in.

Where did everything come from? Consciousness!

Where did all the great minds come from? Consciousness!

What is the basis of reality? Consciousness!

Reality is the past fading into the now going on to the future . . .  reality is not about material things, it is about the observation of them. All the magicians or masters who could do all the great tricks . . . understood that consciousness was more vital and important than what the five senses perceived – ALWAYS!

Note from Jaylee . . .

When I was 14yrs, I was told by my (unknown) guide that nothing that eyes see is real. I contemplated that and began to have my first super natural experiences. Each time, my senses told me one thing, I would go within and request another version – this trained me to see in the non-physical and was the primary reason why Paul and I could flip a motorbike over us and guide it to land behind us, instead of running directly into us. The non-physical (beginning with imagination) is more important, trust worthy and vital to us and is primarily where we live most of the time we are at home in seclusion.

There are a lot of places you can go in this world under the quests of becoming spiritual and you can do some bizarre things. They all have to do with the physical reality! You can put crystals on your head, shine lights on different parts of your bodies, you can have lots of enemas to wash out the toxins of your bodies but little do you know that the toxins are coming from your consciousness. You can do many bizarre things, you can go and sit inside the great pyramid and hope for something wonderful to happen, and of course it won’t. You can try to find the centre of the earth on a journey and keep running away from your place and that will be fun and spiritual, you can all take your clothes off and run around and pretend like you are free – which you know you are not. You can have someone tell you about your past lives and find out who you were before, it is always much more exciting than this life, but then again the only downside to that is you are not that person anymore. Go and find out what is going to happen to your future if you dare to, go and see what the stars tell you today . . . but . . .

Here is a holy place, it is the kingdom of saints, a consciousness that allows you to create a kingdom made of your own will. Here you are going to stretch your brains and not your bodies. Here you are going to become God and you will have to work for it and the glamour will be very small. Here you have to go to a place and create that incredible unseen place in consciousness, no one is going to give it to you but it is a place that the MONSTER cannot go and do its thing. The world of consciousness does not look like this world. This world is a by-product of a monster! – Consciousness doesn’t look like this, it is the ‘I am self’ . . . pure, clean, untainted and holy righteous.

You agree that consciousness creates reality, then you also have to know that whatever you do in consciousness, even though you are being led and pushed through it, must also manifest in physical reality. Where you direct your consciousness, this will produce itself in this reality – unequivocally. So if you have created something so beautiful and before it can even make its way to you, out of pure consciousness, what is it that is in you that would destroy it, that denies a miracle, your MONSTER, your image! People . . . you will have to work all of the days of your life to be greater than that image, to transmute what has been the common image, to turn it completely around toward the dominant consciousness in your life as a god or creator. This is why we, as facilitators, have a preference for awakening conscious people who are on this journey for life and not just dabbling to escape their Doubt.

It has to be pointed out to you how small you really are and unless it is . . . you are never going to become large. It has to be pointed out to you, how dare you Doubt that which you have no comparison to? There is no comparison in this world to the worlds that lie just outside the physical realms. How dare you undermine your God? And if you persist in doing it, you won’t create this kingdom in consciousness. You create a place where the ‘I’ is not this worldly image, the I is not this physical being, the I is that super-conscious self and unless you switch roles, you will return to begin another life unconscious all over again. The Doubter within you, stops the super-conscious self from ever being developed. Each time, you imagine yourself beyond this current version, it rears its head and destroys the amoebic new I, before it has time to form and grow and develop.

Note from Jaylee . . .

When your superconscious being (your double) gains momentum and existence, there is a moment when this small physical self becomes aware that it exists. At first, there is a tug of war as the small self insists on being heard and present but with time and acknowledgment, the super self becomes stronger and stronger and the small self retreats into its rightful place in this world. You may find yourself speaking from either but you will know which because you could say things that you would not normally say, but you will speak with authority and power.

Whatever your consciousness is, if you have a very small consciousness you have a very small world, your pettiness, jealousy, envy, quick to anger and fickleness – small consciousness = small reality. Larger consciousness = greater reality, more knowledgeable, more aware, great consciousness more awareness, greater creativity, losing the pettiness, walking in grace, a consciousness that connects all dimensions together. If you have not made it happen here, you will have no place to go when you leave this existence, because your reality is that limited. Don’t be fooled! There is no rock that is going to save you, no chemical that you can take to open your brain to and there is no diet that you can eat and there is no teacher that is going to save you, as they are going to be too busy focussing on developing their superconscious-self. The only way you can do this, is to rise up, go into the unknown, be willing to learn everything in the unknown – even if nothing about it relates at all to this physical reality that has been your reality up until now. That is the only way and when you create a kingdom in consciousness, you will be fearless at death, because you won’t die – why? Because life doesn’t end with the physical body if you have a super-self.

Note from Jaylee . . .

For all the Doubters . . . this subject is mostly in the unknown and can rarely be proved here (what happens on the other side, that is) except in the presence of someone who has crossed over and returned, having seen and experienced its truth. This is why both Paul and myself teach this with conviction. You literally have to hold onto this ideal even if you cannot see nor hear and hold on unbendingly. Your first glimpse of being conscious in the superconscious-self is impossible to explain to someone who has not experienced it.

You think we are having you do all of these exercises and meditations just for fun, for entertainment? We hope you are enjoying it but it is understanding and learning to crawl in the kingdom of heaven, learning to walk in the kingdom of heaven. Learning to be unlimited in the kingdom of heaven, that your kingdom is unlimited, you can walk and crawl in it. Doubt is a sword that cleaves this kingdom in half, and you are going to have to do something about it and it is your problem. It isn’t our problem . . . it’s yours. How do you get a handle on this MONSTER and address it and come face to face with it is up to you, is it going to get you and in the end is up to you, because the MONSTER’S reward is a death where you lose consciousness?

QUOTE: J Balch

‘He wanted me to tell him what to do with his life . . . as if it was my challenge, instead of his . . .’ 

You have to have the pioneers blood in your veins to develop this internal god who knows that it is more that the MONSTER. Some of you may have experienced that we have disrespect for your MONSTROUS image but we love your inner god so much! This is what has resonated with us, not your image. This is how doubt works in the real world.

“Suppose you have just won a great amount of gold, enough that could fill your house and it was being offered and you won it fairly and you knew it was real so you didn’t doubt it wasn’t there. Now, supposedly someone wrote to you and announced that you have just won all of this gold and you feel the joy and you say ‘I can’t believe it!’ Then they go on to write that the only stipulation in winning this, is of course in fine print, is if you doubt our integrity of giving this to you, you lose.”

This is Doubt simplified. If you don’t Doubt the integrity, the gold is yours . . . what you wish for most, is yours, what you dream of is yours! Throw away your Doubt for one second and believe truly in the unseen – take that chance in yourself, for yourself. The old image must pass away in this lifetime, the cells of the new image must exist in this lifetime but they are only there, can only come about through a definite metamorphosis in your conscious approach to your intricate self, that which you are. If consciousness is creating the nature of reality, what kind of reality do you create when you create doubt? If you are looking for the trap, the hook, the rope, waiting for a contradiction . . . what kind of reality are you then setting up to occur? Doubt it and it won’t happen to you.

How tightly are you bound, and by what laws have you bound your mind? By what laws have you bound your energy and power to do the miraculous, how tight is the rope around you, how many layers have you put around you? How much have you encased yourself in self doubt to protect yourself or against anyone who would take advantage of you and try to change you. How many layers and loops must come off so that the butterfly can fly? Your consciousness is your jailer, and you have made it like that.  You have set up the trip wires that if something doesn’t go right, you are ready to throw it all away and bound yourself up again. Let this be the work of your lifetime!

Task: Place a BIG, FAT word called ‘DOUBT’ in capital letters in block 9! . . . nobody is an exception!