“In the beginning, when you were the most afraid of your intense emotions and the power that they held and were on the cusp of building a dream for yourself, you created a hiding place instead. In your reluctance to receive love, and when you were enamoured by self-pity, you wanted to cover yourself up so that no one would see how terrified you were of your emotions so that no one would notice that you were in the midst of creating a negative reality. Your dream was not a dream to be dreamt; it was a dream to be used as camouflage, as places to hide!” – Jaylee B.

SELF PITY

Imagine . . . You are launched into a world of overwhelming negative odds, taught to have a dream, and encouraged to run at it with joy. You set off in hot pursuit of this, taking off and soaring into the unknown. All goes well, but there seems to be a turn in events if you soar too far. If you stay within the accepted realms of success and well–being, you find that you can cruise in comfort, and once you have established this, you settle in and go no further. All the components of what you learn and experience are part of your personal Dark Tree. Have you not wished for marvellous things and seen them? Have you even touched them? But you never go so far as to totally live them without repercussion and fear . . . 

Imagine  . . . that you are lifting off from the ground towards a cloud that hosts your wildest dreams. You feel exhilarated, on a high, and you feel nothing can stop you. As you reach the cloud level and reach out to grab the dream cloud, there is a tug at your foot that stops you. You look down, hoping to shrug the entrapment that is stopping you from reaching your highest dream. An insidious root embedded in the ground has travelled with you as you rose. You were not aware of it; it never made itself known until this moment. You shake your foot, but its tiny tendrils have implanted themselves into your flesh and become a part of you and your journeys, wherever they may take you. In your desperation, you reach down and yank them away. You begin to rise again, and for a brief moment you taste, touch and see exactly what you wanted all along.

But . . . the insidious tendrils still sit within you, and the root is calling to them in anger and rage. It punishes you for defying it; your dreams collapse and fall to pieces around you. You are so severely humiliated in public that you never want to rise to those heights again – you don’t have it in you.

Nice dramatic tale? Hmm – but that is the story of millions of people across the globe when their finances crash, they are exposed for an affair, their dreams are dashed, they find out something that changes them forever. They drop from a dizzy height, never to recover fully. The Dark Tree of negativity is designed to protect you from going too far into the unknown and will bring you ‘down to earth’ for your own sake.

Take a moment to see when this happened to you: perhaps . . .

Your age old dream to own a cottage somewhere crashed / Your finances went out the window /   You lost your ideal job / You were betrayed, or rejected / You felt deeply humiliated / Your contract was not renewed / Your parents divorced / Your child died / You lost your home / You got cancer / You lost your pets, etc.

 It was something that took your breath away . . . and it seemed to take forever to return to a semblance of normalcy.

THE DARK TREE

We call it the dark tree and, given the Tree of Knowledge metaphors, it seems fitting. But there is a reason for these words. To explain the essence of the imposter tree, we have to go back in time to before you were born. A bright and expansive entity you are! You know no limits and you are free to wander the universe according to your potential and possibilities. However, there is a decision to enter the reality of free will. If you are unconscious, your Higher Self most likely chooses this; if you are conscious, YOU are the higher self who chooses this. Though you and others may perhaps be a reluctant candidate, you were never a victim of an incarnation. In order for you to manage the limits of duality, however, an anchor in free will had to be made. This is what we call the dark root. Essentially, it has the same purpose but can be slightly different in its impact on the life of each person. 

How it works is that the ‘I AM’ (your free, God–like Higher Self) is followed by a word or two that polarize a statement into negativity. Because of your divine nature, there is nothing negative about you, but this root introduces the negative polarity into your incarnation.

I will share with you my own personal example: I AM powerless. [I once was]

That is an example of a dark root.

Without this root, you cannot physically experience duality. The root draws to itself all its counterparts, those you observed within Quest One’s list. This root then grows the dark tree. Your life is a result of this – the tree of good and evil (so they say).

We guide the advanced students to either go physically to the place of their birth or, if it is not possible, to accomplish the same during meditation and pull up that dark root once and for all.

It is time! It is time to dig up that Dark Root. Pull it out of the ground so you can taste the fresh air of success that lies beyond the RING PASS NOT of the collective unconscious programming. Beneath every challenge and paradox in your world, human dignity, character, vision, and vitality are in a state of crisis. No one naturally wants to be mediocre – we are born to be outrageous and fabulous at the same time!

Now it is time to look at why we chose our current blockages and why we permit them to remain in our created reality!

You need to dig a little deeper to uncover some of your payoffs. Payoffs are the little gains that you receive from exhibiting certain behaviours. Deep down, you know that if you release these behaviours, you will lose the gains; you will change and will have to move on. However, if the payoffs are negative, they create psychological and emotional limitations to change and moving on.

Take the two categories – payoffs and hidden agendas – and circle those that immediately stick out for you. Pencil them into the attached Dark Tree image and allow others to surface as you progress on your journey.

Continue to do the Pathway at least once a day but more often if you feel it helps. Always remember that detachment (THE OBSERVER) is the key to looking honestly at yourself and watching the games you have played up until now. It is easy to allow yourself to get caught up and fall into self–pity or a downward spiral of negativity. Be in a place of awe with each aspect that you discover. Do this as if you are looking through a window at a past life, as though you are simply learning about your old self. You will know that you are freely looking at yourself without attachment if you are able to speak about the aspects neutrally and without embarrassment, ego, or humiliation.

Be good and be aware.